It was just so hard to get through Conan without crying like a baby. I'm just so proud of him.
there should be a rule- if you jizz on it, you wash it
Just heard "Kiss Me Though the Phone" for the first time. Amazed how it took Soulja Boy two songs to become a shitter version of Ja Rule.
My birth control alarm just woke me up from my dream where I was pregnant. Thank god.
I wanna get FUCKED up and fail the piss test at my eval so they send me to detox and give me suboxone... Is that bad?
Family of uber douches all wearing ed hardy in a hummer taking up 2 parking spots at starbucks. Please be more cliche
ok watching intervention on tv. when i hit rock bottom - i wanna be THIS chick.
Dave a horae rider a coqw boy
I dunno, but she kept buying me shots and asking me to go places with her. oh btw we're signed up to go bungee jumping Saturday
So I'm drunk playing pool in a bar with a guy I arrested last week for a DUI...if he recognizes me, shit's gonna get real.
don't say the first was when I crawled under into the dressing room
He leaned off the deck, puked a waterfall of beer, looked back at everyone and said "it was just a burp".
Costco (TM). Making alcoholism affordable!
The part where he comes over and ignores you isn't what makes me mad about that story... It's the fact that he ate your tacos, AND THEN proceeded to ignore you. That's cold hearted.
...this is why fuck buddies should be only for grownups.
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