when does round two start
I don't know, I gave up bartenders for lent
Do I give off a "I have a sex tape" vibe???
It's finally official that I am from Oklahoma. I'm currently sleeping with my ex-fling's brother.
I am full of burrito and curiosity
Just got the orientation leader spot. For the first two days, I will be one of the best looking guys on campus. The freshman girls will be so disappointed they settled for me when everyone else comes back.
Just deleted any ex boyfriends and potential lovers from my phone in preparation for Vegas...
I kept telling myself all night that it was completely okay for me to lose all sense of my morals because it was my birthday.
Nothing like hearing a USA chant while getting head. God bless America.
at the last minute we also decided to throw an egg in the beer bong. and he drank it, shell and all.
Just so we're clear this time around: This is dinner with my FAMILY. Not an opportunity for you to drink too much, and use the word "dick-thumpin" in casual conversation.
Note to self; if you can light it on fire, you probs shouldn't drink it
Peanut butter and whiskey is not a dinner
I've made a single handle of rum last like three weeks and my mom hasn't even acknowledged it.
By 9 pm this evening I'll have accomplished smashing with two different guys in two different time zones in the same day.
Stay hydrated
I am no longer and illegal Moonshiner. I just made thousands of gallons of incredibly High test alcohol with police watching and waiting for thare couple of jugs so that they can bring home and disinfect their houses with it. I'm fat with money at the moment.
Randomize
