I'm 3 blocks south of you watching drag queens.
So there are ramen noodles in the shower you need to explain...
If a Romanian girl's marriage isn't considered legal in the US then she's fair game right?
Decided against hooking up with creepy stalker guy for a ride to work. I feel I've earned a few self respect points back.
He could have been a one armed faceless howler monkey. I was so slammered that I didn't care what I was having sex with or if whatever it was... was doing it right.
Let's just say after this weekend I'm known as Shameous the Irish bar fighter.
Doing a circuit workout and using a power hour playlist for my 1 minute timers. I am getting old. creative, but old.
You went into the shower with my roommate and cursed him out asking why he was there
We're like a dynamic duo.
Bisexual and Proud, Lesbian and Loud.
You were typing for me while I was hyperventilating into a paper bag on the floor.
The only reason I have clothes in my overnight bag is to cover up my sex toys.
I JUST WOKE UP WITH MY UBER DRIVER
You go to class with the flu but don't go when it rains... Get your shit together
Also. Picked being late to work over the maid finding my vibrator. Life choices....
Bachelorette party buss just rolled into down town. DTF, "horny hotties inside" and "show us your dicks" written on the windows....this could get interesting.
Randomize
