He freaked out when I started to orgasm. He said he never knew girls could orgasm too.
Just woke up with three stitches in my left boob. Nevertheless, I think I'm going to like this school.
Very nice. It looks like a Fisher-Price My First Dildo, but still very nice.
If we can put a man on the moon, I'm sure we can turn a pringles can into a bong.
i just googled coccaine effects on sexual performance..maybe im dating the wrong guy
The best part of Easter was watching all his colorblind cousins try to find the eggs.
IM GOING TO SIT ON YOUR FACE AND CHANT 'I BELIEVE THAT WE WILL WIN'
Wet should excavate the hamsters out of the front yard n give them a proper burial.
One day soon I'll learn the difference between a good high and way too high. Today is not the day.
I was eating leftover taco bell in bed at 3 in the afternoon. I can't throw any stones
Def don't remember taking those pics I sent you...but it looks like I was in a car? Shit. Looks like my Uber passenger rating just went up exponentially.
Dude on a beach in sicily and a blonde jesus just smoked us out and then tried to makeout with me I am never leaving this place
I was walking out of the bar when he said I'll see you later and I said I'll see you in my dreams and then fell face first and broke my nose
ill drive you to the airport today if we can have sex first
i left yesterday
ill pick you up from the airport on sunday if we can have sex after
Dude we were sitting at my place stoned as fuk then someone knocks on the door and it was my neighbor giving me a huge box of cookie dough. Magic of weed.
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