He has that thing where they hang SUPER low
Ewww!! Elephantitis
yeah so this exboyfriend of yours reckons you're still together and he punched me in the face cos i slept with you last week. you might wanna have a word with him or at a minimum change your facebook status.
Two girls are now jumping in the ocean naked at 10 PM...and I was just starting to hate Ocean City
This chick just checked into her walk of shame on Foursquare... I think I'm in love.
i dont understand why you dont get why i love him. i opened the bathroom door and he had his penis in his right hand and a mcdouble in his left.
He just told me he's been drinking vodka at work all day. I'm starting to believe in soul mates.
We convinced you to take a shot out of the sponge...there were still suds in it.
She's gone now. Left with the wind like a majestic leaf that just rides the invisible current to locations unknown. And dude, her friends were really hot.
It wasn't a basement apartment, it's his parents basement. And he wanted to show me his pet tarantula collection. I NOPED THE FUCK OUT!
I'm watching porn in spanish. Thats studying right?
I'd do them all but honestly I'm so high that I probably should have a chaperone.
I mean I'm sad it didn't work out but tbh he he can't unlick my booty hole or unbreak his headboard... He won't forget my name ever
If he's gonna send me dick pics; he should at least zoom in to make it look bigger.
I met a guy last night who bought me a book on Amazon at the bar and then we had sex. Boners for books is a thing. Boom.
I have dined. Now I want to get fucked.
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