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I would blow Magic Johnson for a pack of lucky strikes right now. Post-hiv.
The line was so long at Kum n Go some guy opened & drank 2 beers from his 12 pack while waiting.
I managed to throw up 90 feet under water, just removed my breathing tube, puked, put it back in. All inclusive is the way to go.
I've had cake for breakfast the past 3 days. You tell me how bikini season is going.
oh my god. were standing in the kitchen and were chanting "EYEBROWS" and shaving peoples eyebrows. I have work tomorrow and want to keep my eyebrows.
ok perfect im about to bedazzle our mini keg named hans. he is ready to rage
Things I have learnt this week: bubble mix is toxic. Extremely toxic.
Someone has big plans this weekend. Just went to throw away the trash and saw packaging for 3 different vibrators on the top of the stack
You brought string cheese to the strip club
LMAO I like how "don't worry I'll bring chasers" is your way of assuring things will be ok
I will read books by day and do guys by night. A mental and physical enlightenment, if you will.
can we not compare my dick to a children’s folk tale
DO NOT TOUCH THE SOAP ITS HAD SOME UNORTHODOX USES WITHIN THE PAST 15 HOURS
His sex game is strong it’s like a warlord’s dick! you know what I mean?
Nope
Randomize
