last night i got mauled by 2 gay men who were trying to make each other jealous by making the other think they could swing back- you're going to love atl
i just woke up and its 10 o'clock and the words "Robbies Fave Restraunt" and written in sharpie above my vage. Help me.
I love how understanding people are when they hear we first hooked up getting high and watching nature shows
You insisted I take photos of you vomiting off the top of the tree.
She had a baby and now works at Hooters. She is the poster child for peaking in high school.
"thanks for the sex" was written in lipstick on my bathroom mirror. i'm officially done with random hook ups.
We defiantly won best dressed in the ER tonight
Mission get my tooth back and find a new dick to ride starts after i sleep for the first time in 2 days.
He fell asleep and I'm awkwardly laying here because all I have to wear is my tutu. I'm pretty sure his roommate is going to be back soon so this should be fun. This is my life now. PS. the background of his phone is a picture of his hedgehog.
we're like Indians of the 21st century. trading not for food and survival but personal gain and by trouble you mean getting daytime drunk and going to the roller ring then yes.
I am so juiced up on period drugs and coffee I feel like my skin is going to fall off.
We were tripping too hard to figure out to tell him where we were so we sent a picture of me laying outside the tent saying "find us"
Being able to fart in my own house is like 90% of why I pay rent
I would rather her be sleeping with someone new than getting to go Harry Potter world before me...
The last time I saw her someone was carrying her on a bike and she was yelling that she was E.T.
Randomize
