Is it possible to jerk off a nipple?
tiger just fucked it up for all of us...she grabbed my phone this morning and started asking questions.
You seriously looked at the house acorss the street and implied that you thought they had nice Easters.
And then he tried to clean the throw up off my pants with 409
I will never in my life forget you letting the cat lick your tongue
How do I enter a double puke and rally into my calorie counter?
You're married and I'm going to make out with a stranger tonight. Isn't that weird? It's like a gap in the time space continium.
I'm having salsa con queso and a leftover half-drank/flat red bull for breakfast. Nothing you propose doing today would be a downgrade.
Its alot like that time you got motorboated by the carni at the rodeo.
Girl re-adjusts bra, no one bats an eye. I re-adjust nuts, everyone stares.
Sorry, I was watching the Olympic story about the Canadian guy and drinking out of the prescription bottle and crying because it was so beautiful.
My sex life is driven by spite and alcohol
You squatted and peed on the living room floor while maintaining eye contact with Sebastian
Like I just wanted some midlife crisis fun, not drama as big as his dick.
One of my nipples looks nothing like the other...i don't know how this happened
Randomize