I'm at the bar and I just saw some unnecessary and accidental cooter...sometimes I think girls need a license to go out pantyless in public.
You stole her cigarette screaming that you were going to stop the air cancer from getting everyone.
at least i was looking out for everybody
Your friends ate a hole through an entire loaf of bread
I will not ride trays down a flight of stairs topless and drunk....
I'd be a gr8 surrogate. I'm gonna love your fetus
Having never done that before, When should one expect the horrible shame to end? Days, months, ever?
A week or so, depending on size. In your case, maybe give it a month.
If court goes my way we are flying to Vegas.
The best part of that night wasn't even the sex, it was listening to her explain to her boyfriend why she was naked in her room while I hid in her closet.
Things I want for my birthday 1. a Chipotle grade tortilla steamer 2. a new liver
she put on her moms wedding dress and is chugging purple jolly rancher vodka, happy cyber monday
Had a turkey baster with clean pee in it in my pants to pass a drug test, and the bottom fell off, so yeah I'm pretty pissed.
haha all our friends are at the carnival and I'm on stage dry humping a 40 year old
At this point, I wouldn't be surprised if he laughs at all of our attempts to keep him sober.
just move with us, we wanted to get a dog. youre kind of the same thing..
so do you remember taking your shirt off and just standing in your bra at the bar or no?
Randomize
