Fuck you I wanted that fabulous flaming homo to win american idol...its like we lost the gay marriage vote...again
why do our vaginas work when we are blacked out?? it's just not fair.
the red, white, and blue power rangers were all also in the porn buisness, good bye childhood
i have a new found respect for you. the amount of people you must have cockblocked last night is amazing
"Students using Axe body spray to light selves on fire" is a real headline from a real newspaper. WHY AREN'T WE DOING THIS RIGHT NOW?
After last night, I've decided I will now bang only men who professionally ride things for a living. I will accept jockeys, cowboys, bullriders, and pro bicyclists who lie and say they're bullriders.
Is it appropriate to put "Mommy and Daddys shitfaced-ness that led to Aubrey" on a birth announcement?
Well you two just had a kid in the middle of college, I dont think anyone will notice.
Thanks bro
I don't remember much of half-time. I do remember climbing onto the roof of the fraternity and telling people I was going to stargaze in French.
I'm venturing to your corner of this sin house in t minus 2 minutes.
He pointed at me, then leaned in and said "shes the best at blow jobs" then chris fist pumped him and said "dude, I know"
so today, i decided to say "fuck it" to mental stability, take a klonopin and wear a blanket toga. New Girl is on Netflix, nothing could go wrong.
Dude hobos go hard. I learned a lot last night.
Naked. naked and bneed help.
I wore my Gollum shirt. It struck up a conversation AND got him staring at my boobs. That's a win-win.
And he put my hair in my clip while i blew him...and he did a good job
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