if i'm ever as drunk as the girl in front of me... kill me.
I had a talk with my mom about respecting myself and not acting like a whore so she will rip my nose ring out if she somehow sees that picture
Roman Polanski is more welcome at my daughter's birthday party than you are at that bar
I think jizz is working it's way to becoming my number 1 food source.
This is getting ridiculous. See/touch her boobs=good day. Not see/not touch her boobs=bad day. I am legitimately depressed over the lack of tits in my hands right now.
in a thick russian accent she said "im not so good with english, much better with dick"
there is a video of me from last night trying to light my breath on fire. that drunk.
It was one of those "wake up holding a random metal flower" kind of nights.
Made out with a chick in front of a girl I'm banging and successfully reDENNISed her within 9 hours
You know when you meet a penis that looks like it was made out of all your hopes and dreams?
So again no comment on the cleavage. I'm a bit disappointed. If those girls come together to make cleavage AND I send you a pic of it, you have to comment on it. That's like relationship 101.
you really need to remember next time not to write your name and phone number on the paper its wrapped in.
But what if it got lost?
its illegal. you dont want people to contact you if they find it.
Is her dick bigger than yours?
Mike Pence got the fuck boy eyes though
I once took a shot of lighter fluid.. That's not a secret just a fucked up story
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