I just realized i haven't had sex in 2009. oh man thats embarrassing.
I just used a tire swing as a toilet. I think I'm gonna pass out here so I can see the look on the first kid who uses it in the morning.
i just saw someone i know on True Life. i need new friends.
if i remember New Year's Eve then there is something seriously wrong.
My porch is a mess of peanut butter and tostitos...thanks for that.
I got used. This is the happiest day of my life. I was just a huge cock and that is all she needed.
I can feel his 12 year old sister"s eyes barreling into my soul everytime I'm at there house..some how she knows I'm cheating on her brother or she's mad cause I stole her shirt.
I found your knife. It was stuck in my bedroom ceiling.
Then you bent down and whispered, "excuse me mr. Stair, could you please stop moving?"
At one point, he came in to give her a pep talk, and then after he left, she just kept whispering his name into the toilet between heaves.
i just googled coccaine effects on sexual performance..maybe im dating the wrong guy
I need to stop getting picked up at 3 am by my friends parents. This is the second time this week. I'm a grown man.
I appreciate having someone to objectively critique my dick pics.
OMG I DIDNT READ THAT TEXT CAREFULLY CAUSE I'M ON THE DEVILS LETTUCE & I THREATENED TO PUNCH A CHILD OMG I'M SO SORRY
I just didn't expect to have anal in a retail store at 9 AM on a Tuesday.
Randomize
