Almost ran you over in the parking lot. You look good
Its a good thing the lights were off cuz Im pretty sure the look on my face when I touched his penis would have offended him
Just checked an empty cooler on the flight to Notre Dame. You don't have to tell me you're jealous, I already know.
I rode on his Vespa around Florence and fucked him in an empty train. It was like a way sluttier version of Lizzy McGuire
is it sad that i can honestly say it was the best birthday sex i've ever had and it was still terrible?
You didn't even properly utilize my pigtails.
Im coming down to miami this weekend
We shall drink from the everclear river
Like theyre better than no shoes. I'm sitting her balls naked playing xbox in nothing but crocs with the fur
So I pull up to an apartment complex and immediately felt like I was here to get stoned.
It was like something out of a fucked up fairy tale. He just crowdsurfed over to her while riding a keg, said "come sail with me", and then the crowd carried them off into the night. What.
I'm gonna watch porn and nap. I think I really have this Valentine's Day thing down
He brought me flowers and then spanked me with a Doctor Who paddle. Pretty good night, as these things go.
Awwwwwww!
I just found (and ate) a chunk of a reese's that fell between my boobs. Problem is that I finished those off 3 days ago in a drunk induced sob session... Has it really been that long since I changed my clothes?!
Hahah I’ve never had someone stop me mid-coitus to tell me how amazing I am. Def ego boost.
We smell like vodka and hangover
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