North Korea, Best Korea!
im typing and i feel like my hands are on backwards.
Stop texting me, I'm right here.
tell ils to like buy her flowers and like a balloon that says, sorry I tried to fuck your sister. I think hallmark makes some of those cards too.
all she kept saying was "harder" "mayo" and "who are you"
I've banged too many servicemen's wives to still be considered an American.
All I did was present the dick. You did the work. That's like thanking the pencil for a test you got an A on.
I'm making you a bingo card for hookups of the school year 2011-12 so you can make even worse life decisions next year
I think I've had 45 beers today though So things are looking up.
How are you not embarrassed to know me. I'm a mess right now. I'm a walking, talking tornado of embarrassment
YOU WORK IN THE US CAPITOL! YOU CANNOT HAVE SEX IN THE BATHROOM!!
Dude, you are totally ruining intern season for me...
Whatever. I am not explaining the physics of my dick slapping.
OUR DIABOLICAL SLUT PLAN HATH COMMENCED!
I'm hoping the sedatives kick in before I drunkenly decide to eat this whole cheesecake.
He just sent me a picture of multiple chickens eating in his kitchen... should I be worried
Now I know Sunday Funday means fucking till you loose your voice.
Randomize
