Who goes to Church hungover
Those who weren't lucky enough to go still drunk
school has made you so classy.
that's mcgill. producing sluts since 1884.
Is it a bad that I spent my 5 year anniversary with my husband texting my ex boyfriend?
he left me a 6 minute video of him peeling a clementine listening to justin bieber
It's gotten to the point where even copying off yahoo answers is still way too much work.
I just threw up in a patch of wild flowers on the side of the road. I never knew rock bottom was so beautiful.
yea man just watch out- theres a shitload of broken glass in your bed
Ever have those mornings where you just can't wait to puke in the shower?
I have six drafts of messages to you that just say "blood" and I have no idea where they came from.
The cops said we could pay $250 or spend the night in jail and get 2 free meals. I might pee in mail-boxes more often
I'm not throwing down for dinner because I plan to have so much tequila I puke it up anyways. How much is a cab home?
Thanks be to the Goddess of Whores!! I straightened my bed before Ken got here. Found Calvin's boxers in the sheets!!!!
I am not being the messenger for your booty call.
I spoon fed you cheerios when you were black out drunk. You owe me one.
Maverick's sitting in jail wearing a turkey costume and I am soooo jealous.
Once you start using "cuddles" as a code word for sex you'll never get real cuddles again
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