my sisters under your porch take her home
I've spent 9 hours vomitting in the fetal position... how did i stay like this for 9 months?
We're the kind of people who ruin family vacations
You were spooning my trash can and I had to crumble cookies on the floor by your face to get you to eat
One date. That's all it took. I want to have his geunis babies in me. One date.
Hey got that picture this morning. 1. clean your room 2.what happened to your nail? and 3. your penis is amazing,.
the head trauma was worth the blowjob.
The next time you try to involve a tickle me Elmo in my orgasm, I'm leaving you
I'll be home next weekend. Its mothers day. Let's party just enough so we are frightened it might be our first
I got custody of our girlfriend in the breakup.
Cancun blessed me with a drinking problem
day drinking caused me to be in bed at a decent time. can't complain.
Today is going to be a great day. He just brought me a donut on his dick... It's Sticky Dick Donut Day!!!
at this point I think you're judging my taste in men
I swear I'm not
It's okay, I'm judging my taste in men
I’m going down on him like an Oompah Loompah on roller skates.
That makes no sense, but good luck
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