I thought if I stared at him long enough he'd walk me to my car. but he didn't. he dddidn't. i rreally thought i had those powers.
Had a couple pieces of pizza for breakfast...suck on that Jamie Oliver.
It's never good when you wake up covered with burns
I think she's a little more wasted than usual. She just crawled on the floor to tell mom it was time to take a shot.
Honestly, it was easier to just put it in my mouth than to deal with an awkward conversation.
dinner is belligerent. she just poured the rest of the pitcher of margaritas into a take home box. people are staring.
I'm bringing a flask to the test on friday. If I'm gonna fail at least I can enjoy the experience
Maybe I don't remember every single thing... I think there's a hi lighter treasure map drawn on my arm...
I just found it. I hope it leads to food.
All of the hungover. I've changed not showered but can't quite make it to the booze.
WE'RE IN THE RED ZONE PLAY THRU THE PAIN
Also, I called my liver hardcore in front of vet students last night and then wound up having three of them trying to palpate it. So...not saying that again.
I told the person I was on the phone with to hold on while I looked for my phone. I think it's time to stop doing dabs.
i told them you weren't like that.. and they laughed at me?
the police dropped me off. that's how my night went.
Let’s try it, I’ve never had a bad time with sex, tacos and beer.
My dad is clearly baked off his ass. He almost sat on moms cat in front of her, zoned out while staring at it and said he wondered what it was thinking about. Now he's dragging everything from the livingroom into the garage. Moms not happy.
Randomize
