I was in the bathroom and her cat just looked at my penis with a profound hatred.
16 and pregnant actually makes me really happy that i'm gay
Who has a video camera? i want to look back on this one day and say OH thats why i spent 2 years in jail
So I wake up this morning with a bottle of dish detergent and a dildo. Good call on bringing those girls from community college.
Your doorknob is in my back seat, in case you were looking for it.
I just need three more girls to complete my 'Freak-a-leak' bang list. Know any girls named Zahra, Shavon, or Daronda?
As his dick went in he shouted GOAL at the top of his voice.
No but I was fuckin done when I realized my acrylic nail caught fire when I was hitting the bong.
sometimes, you gotta take him by the hands like tails took sonic, and fly him into the bedroom.
I came to the party for him. I don't know where he went, but I mentioned being hungry and his housemate brought me a huge tupperware container of berry cobbler. I think I'll stay.
idk the fact that her roommate had a sign that said "enter without knock, exit without cock" makes me really NOT want to go steal her pot.
There is a car windscreen wiper in my handbag... Not my car's, not ok.
The magician guy on probation is here at the bar. I'm gonna get him to show me a trick
He called out my ex's name during sex.
Alex is a pretty common unisex name.
It was the same Alex. I asked.
I just had a morning three-some with marijuana and a detachable shower-head
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