They say you shouldnt they say its no good for the environment in your vagina
Do you think they'll have a special part during the BET awards for Michael Jackson even though he turned white?
dude i just heard a girl tell another girl 'what part of im trying to get laid tonight dont u understand?'
needless to say i wont be back home tonight
We may or may not have a drunk cat on our hands.
We're friends. And when I drunkenly send u a pic of my left testicle i would appreciate a response.
LA Sucks. The only way i can get laid is if i tell people im at a law firm that represent film producers.
And when they figure it out, they act like IM shallow.
you grabbed his arm with one hand and the bottle of smirnoff with the other and headed off to your room you were on a mission
I've been very busy/drunk lately... Sorry.
I dont feel as bad coming home this baked because I gave my 14 year old sister a no drugs talk last night.
Woke up this morning with an extra $35 and someone else's ATM receipt. How much did I drink last night?
You must take up my position now. You must pass out in awkward places as I taught you... Sears a hotel elevator and Burger King bathroom. You potential for greater young grasshopper.
Don't act like you're a victim to marijuana
THERE ARE SO MANY HOT DADS AT WHOLE FOODS
Nxt time we drink that much, we'll have to hide the crayons. Crayola-ing a mural on the living room wall wasnt the brightest idea, but it sure is classy. Right?
Gotta love college... Pregamed for my 8:30 flight home this morning and gave the flight attendants all high fives when I got on the plane. Best ride of my life.
Randomize
