You hurt me so bad and it feels so good
I seriously can't date anymore I forgot how to hide my crazy
The goblet must only be used for good. And vodka. And anything t-pain would be proud of.
It was like good, clean fun, but with bodyshots.
It could be worse. I was dumped by a guy in a kilt after he gave my shoes away on St. Patrick's Day.
I didnt finish. My brain kept playing the duck tales theme thru the entire blow job
I just saw someone dressed as a bear leave your house on a motorcycle. I guess you guys are having a good time.
The thing about pooping in the woods during hunting season is you never know if someone's watching you.
Also, asking the guy who just told you he is crippled on edibles to watch your kid is probably frowned upon by most
I'm pretty sure that waking up butt ass naked with a bottle of 151 and a note that said "I didn't want to wake you up, but thanks" proves I had a good time....god bless America
Honestly cannot tell if I’m magical or really, really high.
Cum just came out of my nose. That is all.
Fun fact: deep throating plus dehydration plus eating a lot of citrus = my throat is fucked. Metaphorically and physically.
so i fell out of a tree on the ave last night. someone told me there was alcohol at the top. bastards.
true. but still. you know how big of a sucker i am for a penis and a pretty face.
Randomize
