Literally like 10 people walking in my building talking about how much they hate draco
every time I worry about a career mistake, I remember Michelle Pfeiffer did Grease 2.
can we please take bets on how much therapy you'll need in the future?
I was so high i started crying when i saw how much puppychow was there.
you threw up in the bushes next to the ABC store and kept saying "you're home, blueberry vodka, you're home!"
This was all being yelled across a beer pong table as all important things should be discussed
i slept with her, drove her to her sisters house to babysit, and then drove around the block where i met her sister and had sex with her in my van. I'm family Friendly!
The hookah bar is playing i'm on a boat. I believe in god again.
I gotta shower this stuff off me I'm starting to hear baby kittens in the toilet tank again..
you're good to come back. The bouncer pulled me aside and told me. He also said you have nothing to worry about and that you have an awesome "upper punch" or some shit
Dammit now I'm pissed. Its like I am torn between two worlds. A world of girls, and a world of people punching other people in the head. Both are just so beautiful.
You're wearing a hospital gown and pearls. Let's reevaluate your life.
Dude did I even see you at the bar. Cause I was for sure there then the next second apparently I was crying next to my Christmas tree because nobody believed in me.
sexting just seems like too much work right now.
She thought I was dancing but I just couldn't catch my balance for 11 blocks.
Randomize