I just wish we had the ability to download food from our TVs.
I asked my mom, she said yes...but you have to shower with grandpa.
rainy day on campus = new personal fetish for girls in booty shorts and colorful rain boots
Just got a lecture from Dad about how I need to be more responsible and start buying my weed in larger quantities so that i can save money. Like he was serious and kind of disappointed in me for not adapting to his method earlier.
I just had a formal request to dress as a boyscout for my meeting with Legal on Friday. From Legal. Time to go home.
Wella between the drunkards, the inevitable slutty costumes, and someone doing a BODY SHOT OFF A PREGNANT GIRL, i lost my halloween spirit. Bah humbug.
I'm at about main and main street
The shit show didn't end. it just relocated itself to my apartment instead of yours.
you also need to get my treadmill fixed.
WHO JUST REMOVED THAT SAME BOARD IN TWO MINUTES FLAT WITH NO INJURIES, SHOES, SOCKS, OR BRA?! THIS BITCH. CRACKIN A BEER FOR DA SHOWA. BITCHES AIN'T SHIT MOTHAFUCKA
It's probably not healthy how legit bummed I am that my bottled of wine is gone.
I made out with a girl because I wanted to get in the VIP section of the bar because they have these big comfy couches. It worked.
Just reintroduced tequila back into my life...so that's happening
YAS SHES BACK AND BETTER THAN EVER
I woke up in an ill fitting childs tutu this morning and the shower curtain is knocked down. Wtf happened?
Will Smith has a direct hotline to my emotions
Last night I had a dream that I changed my last name to Vodka. what does that say about my life?
Randomize
