seems the shocker is way more shocking if u get the fingers wrong
you drank a bottle of vodka and then while throwing up in my toilet you kept reminding me our hs reunion was in 2 yrs and it was time to start getting thin again anyway
Down at Ground Zero right now. So many people here. It's the most patriotic game of grabass Ive ever seen.
Well I'm just gonna sit here naked in this chair and whatever happens happens
We need to play Chardee MacDennis. Contact me when you have an available date. This is not a question.
Did you ask me to bring you a t-shirt to class or did I just dream that?
No, I did. It's a long story.
My mom now keeps ice cubes on hand for my bong water. We may be able to work this relationship out.
exactly. I want him to have to live with the fact that he fucked me. I want him to look me in the eye and say "you were a drunken mistake".
im currently assessing the tequila situation in preparation of your arrival
Be proud. All I did last night was roll around in my nun costume selling drugs. I love Halloween.
Fuck off I wasn't that drunk. I was still able to toss froot loops in the air and catch them in my mouth.
And in your bra. It was quite entertaining.
There is a high possibility I will pass out with my hand in a bag of Doritos
You kept insisting you found queso that's better than oral sex
I'm not a whore anymore. I gave up 90% of my women for you. I'm a 4-5 woman kind of guy now.
Youre saying I should leave him? Have you seen the dating pool these days? It's terrifying, and in the capital region it's straight Norman Bates
Randomize
