hey can you give me head? jesse told me that you're really good
who is this?
jesse's little brother
Am I allowed to make my facebook status "loves farting in chairs"? I think it would shock every boy that I am friends with.
I spent an hour trying to convert bar outfits to church outfits. Its hard.
i gave her a can of corn and told her the cabs are accepting non perishable food items over the holidays. blatant lie and she lives like $40 away
Man when i saw they were the only ones hard core grinding to the Cha Cha slide against the wall, I knew they were gonna have sex tonight.
Kate gave me a 3 day old cup of tequila last night and forced me to chug it. P.s. i drew u a picture
Who knew drunk me could climb a 17 story building for apple juice and sex
Lets be real here, you loved it when I was on top. With and without the machete.
How are you going to come here and fuck on our couch ? That's everyones couch
You screamed "There's a potato in my anus" and proceeded to attempt to grind with the bouncer. Also, I'm pretty sure our Chem teacher was in the same bar as us.
Omg, those nutella cakes are heavenly, like licking the nipples of a muscular black Jesus.
Maybe I can find a straight girl rehab camp, like the opposite of those degaying camps, where they teach me how to love the ladies instead
Omg. I would pay ALL OF THE MONEY for that camp.
So I pass out narcotics if its a girl?
You ever have a fart follow you around?
Feel free to drag me back to reality at your convenience
Randomize
