Was going to watch Bolt. Fucked a stranger instead. Details later.
So you didn't like Bolt?
i'm the matthew mcconaghey of this party. i'm too old, and too high.
It was awkward until we both realized our obsessions with harry potter and sangrias were the same. Now were in love.
You need tk get a life and stop texting me about fictional characters. I don't give a shit.
my roommate left her license, credit card, and cellphone on her desk. I feel like this is a trap.
plan parent hood is for high school, im at the abortion clinic, so college.
I'm not sure how exactly, but this funeral has turned into a ridiculous night of drinking games
boobs and vodka. thats all i can remember, finals week needs to stop ending like this..
Do any of you want to be on a three way call with me while this girl masturbates in 10 min? You can't talk
Found a dirty envelope on my seat w ur name and $122.50 written on the front. Nothing inside but what looks like dirty pine needles
Ha, I bet. You tipped the waitress like 10 bucks for a glass of water.
the mechanics of walkigng feel weird right now everyone lools like a demon
what does alcohol mean
Ya he's alive. Apparently he's been drinking Naty and listening to Unbreak My Heart on repeat all day.
let me just inform you that suppository-ing xanax is glorious
I found a hair colour I want in a porn.
Like Napoleon Dynamite?
Exactly like Napoleon Dynamite
But with bacon.
Randomize
