Thanks for last night it was amazing as always
What are you talking about
You've got to be kidding me
I just said that Oprah is crazy and like 5 fat white girls jumped down my throat. I sat back and smiled.
I thought I hit my peak drinking in college. Just finished first day on Wall Street. College was nothing.
you go from almost hooking up with the hottest guy at the party, to going home with your ex....how is that even mathematically possible
He was going down on me and raised up for a minute, slipped and punched me in the face. My lady boner left immediately.
My last google search was 'bulk asian wives' I don't know either
I swear to Christ if it turns out to be an intervention, i will set you on fire.
I just wanna be like "dude your gf's on a porn site" but i just dont know if i have the heart.
In this town being related to a brewing family or the owner of a sports team is like being royalty. It's like hooking up with the queen's nephew or something.
I'm sorry but the visual image of you suffocating on vagina is basically hysterical
look for me at the Giants game I will possibly be the drunk girl passed out by 2nd
Exactly best part of my night he took of his shirt and surprise traveler fanny pack
Just calling to thank you for not dying. I love you.
half way down the stairs my legs said fuck this and i just fell the rest of the way...
omg last night while walking home from your house I stole a seatless bike and carried it into my next door neighbors kitchen.. we just looked It up online it's an antique and worth $500 dollars
Randomize
