I think they should rename 16 and pregnant to "I was fucked in highschool and all I got was a baby and humiliated infront of the nation on MTV"
your cum blends into my yellow sheets :/
I just want a better ending for myself. Not walking around with one sock on and my bush hanging out.
I don't care if the man pisses on teenage girls, he's enchanting.
You always know it is going to end badly when a guy asks if he met you at a "coed naked lawn bowling party"
you're surprised the chick that fucked you for a free cup has herpes. i don't feel bad for you.
I smell like gasoline and adventure.
I want this pizza in and around my mouth forever..
I was afraid someone would drug test my pants so you set them on fire.
We don't know where he is but he left his pants and what appears to be a tooth here so he's gotta come back sometime
Have you ever got so drunk that you tasted the future?
Sooooooo Your wife and your girlfriend are making cat noises at one another via text
My mom just asked me if I knew what Buzzfeed was. Then said she's watching the second Magic Mike for the bodies. Please help.
Turns out he's actually a she. Might keep dating her just to see Mom's reaction.
I called him my big strong man today. It's all downhill from here. Matching Christmas sweaters, here we come
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