Bike broken, reschedule party till thursday:(
i'm going through the NYU 2014 group looking for future drunken hookups. too slutty?
its a long story involving jim bean, an owl, and a knife
We need to talk about our relationship.
I just won a bet involving 10 tequila shots. You've got about 3 minutes
He sent a pic, I sent one back. Then nothing. It's like we sext-messaged goodbye and ended the relationship.
I wonder if he has realized that I have poured all if those shots he bought into the tip jar
I'm babysitting my fucking roommate he took out the screen and is trying to throw dishware in our fucking pool after he repelled off our balcony
James this is colleen. This is my new number. You just texted my grandma about getting cockblocked. Congratulations.
In honor of Dennis Farina dying, I'm offering up free mustache rides...2 takers so far.
mom had to come pick me up from the hotel. I crawled to her car. She told me the entire way home if I puked in it I was going to lick it up. Like high school all over again...
Is it too early to get staydrunk at 1pm on Friday for Monday's St Patty's day
No one wanted to hang out so vodka and I are hanging out
Laying on my driveway in my pajamas in the sun having my severe hangover cigarette, and the daycare house across the street is having playtime in the yard! I believe I'm currently being what's known as a "bad example!"
If you are refering to the duckling living in your bath...I can explain, but before I do, can you throw a peice of bread in there?
He took off all my clothes, fingered me, than said "would you be more comfortable if I was naked too?"
Randomize
