Richard, I just read on your Twitter account that you have enjoyed a, "Much needed post birthday smoothie..."...A bit revealing, no?
just did a line in a complete hula outfit off a chick in a devil costume. do you think hell will be this good?
I just saw a girl licking a cheeseburger wrapper. dont ever let me get that fat
She's "scared" of blowjobs, so she just played with it for a while.
We had sex in front of Notre Dame Cathedral, but I lost my wallet. God giveth and God taketh away.
Currently coming up with judgment, the game. Works well on buses, will probably be more entertaining in bars.
Well... When your girlfriend fucks your sister, the 2 week courtesy window goes out the door.
There is naked swordfighting and something green and alcoholic going on in the basement. COME. OVER. NOW.
I was so high I watched a 5 minute video of different scenes of horses running. The music was magical.
I woke up in your kitchen with my ID in my hand and my nails were painted electric blue. Dude.... never let me have fireball again.
So you're at your daughter's volleyball game looking at dicks online? That's amazing.
No, I was picking her up from volleyball and sitting in my car looking at dicks.
Fuck you and your fucking taquito's.
We have angered the beer gods. It feels like I'm shitting angry cats.
Please come over. It's a pajama and burn-2016-in-effigy party
Oh btw, ur tongue should count as a second cock it's that good
Randomize
