Lonely and bored. Am I allowed to play Dance Dance Revolution by myself?
How do u explain cocaine to a 9 year old?
it was either that or behind a dumpster, and i am way too pretty to pee behind a dumpster
Yo I tried to get u stoned for ur dreams by blowing weed smoke in ur face while u slept. Ur welcome.
Watching the gap toothed girl get more ass than me is almost devastating.
while you laid on the ground I poured water into your mouth out of dog bowl some random guy walks by and said now that's what I like to see.
He's either jacking off or listening to Kanye West.
I'm that hungover student in class ... On a wednesday morning
Omg I think I'm in the wrong class
Codeine + Boredom = Sprinting between my front and back door.
Please don't place wagers on my sex life unless you are giving me a cut. With my current sluttiness I feel like I deserve 40% for how much money you'll make
Ok well i was gonna say you can only borrow my fog machine if you will use it to emerge from your room in a cloud of smoke after having sex with sarah, so yeah we're good
STAY IN YOUR APARTMENT. DONT GO TO SAFEWAY TO BUY CONDOMS. DONT GO TO THE VAN.
You got your ass kicked outside KFC on Tuesday
Can't we just go back to fucking and having your boyfriend think you're completely straight?
its so awesome dude, its like im a magical unicorn or something
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