how do you clear previous safari searches on an iPhone? i asked my brother to google something for me and "big penis" "empire chinese food" and "reverse cowgirl" popped up.
Deffinety need to stop having sex on the beach just took a dump and it was mostly sand
You told the cops that they couldn't arrest you because they weren't hot enough to fuck
You had the genius idea to tape beer to the celing fan. There goes his security deposit. He is gonna be fuckin pissed.
People are yelling about how much they want you here.
I'm going to change, vomit up my mexican food to save the trouble later, and then come meet you. Thrilled.
I'm doing homework tonight but if you end up going out drinking I would like one courtesy peer pressure text.
I'm at the bar alone. Is this how you feel?
Recycling my beer bottles from breakfast counts for earth day, right?
I dont know about you but I'm not getting out of bed this summer for anything but food or sex
Promise me you won't have sex in my room
I can't promise you that, but I promise you that I'll try
Might want to in your tub tho. That thing is fucking huge.
They were loudly fucking last night and there was way too much conversation involved. It wasn't even dirty talk, it was more like "your doing it wrong" talk
I was wondering how I got the burn marks on my boobs and then I remembered....
The baked potato bra?
All I have in my new place is coke and a treadmill.. it's workout Wednesday
I need to stop getting drunk and telling people it isn't "about them."
Her blowjob technique? Picture someone attempting to drink a triple thick milkshake through a Capri Sun straw.
Randomize
