careful when you do the walk of shame, they are handing out bibles on campus
What's the politest way to tell someone that you're only interested in them when they're naked, and even then it's just like a passing "meh?"
dude your cousin who was wearing the skirt wasn't wearing any underwear
gross she's a slut
yea she doesn't shave either
I feel like a panda just shit rainbows on my mind
just gave a homeless man a kiss in exchange for two handles
exact location. now.
i was taking the test and had to adjust my boner and my teacher thought i was cheating or something
chlamydia ends and my period begins. this isnt real life
I asked you if you were ok and you said "dude I'm fine, I'm in the recovery position"
I have been drinking since 2. And I'm now chasing the cat around the house with a light saber. Anna's helping.
Lets get real here, ive seen your moms breasts multiple times
i got up, ate a McDouble, then went straight back to bed.
You sure know how to make a day worth living.
Who says there aren't gentlemen anymore? My one night stand warmed up my car for me
That's why you need to have them together. Katie started crying on the couch and she just gave her a tube of crackers and picked up a beer at the same time. She's like a goddess of making things chill
I'm just drunk enough to be eating egg rolls on the toilet
If it makes u feel any better my dick feels pretty tender dude
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