Glitter + Penis = Best. Idea. Ever.
he just stuck his car key in my belly button, made car starting noises and pretended like i was revving my engine?
It just sucks seeing everyone get flowers but me...
yeah, but they die. it takes a while, but they die. just like all of these kids relationships will. tequila doesnt die. its a live in the moment thing... like a valentines day one night stand. so long run, tequila is the better gift.
no memory loss, but i'm unhappy with my memories
maybe if i keep dancing i won't throw up
as he pulled out he yelled "no kids!" and then passed out on top of me
yeah a little bit of me felt bad about it. But the rest of me was having sex with him.
Solid teamwork gives us a good shout of both bringing home trophy cougs
All I know is that your reaction after this date with him was "I think I did cocaine" so I'm sold on this boy
Sex last night was mind blowing. your wife is one lucky lady.
I just pulled the nickels from earlier out of my bra in class. The guy next to me is either terrified or intrigued.
She called and said her prescription was refilled. I guess we are dating again.
Also, if asking a guy to come over and watch curling with you doesn't scream let's fuck then idk what does
Yes. Life would be much easier if we had penises & could do whatever the fuck we want.
Have you ever realized how weird it is to think that you've fucked someone and don't know what their handwriting looks like?
Randomize