Dude judst bought snd smokked tfour white widoew jointsd in Asmsterdam. Wstching the Cvhiefs gsme. Oh Boy.
You are why other countries hate Americans. But I say God bless you.
I cant go down on him yet. All ive had to eat is olives and percocet. semen would only add to tomorow mornings discomfort.
capt morgan doesn't hurt if you honestly believe it's golden flavored kool-aid.
either she doesn't know how to dress properly on a sunday morning stroll, or I just saw a 60 year old on a walk of shame
Nicole wore just a belt and her pedometer and hopped on top of me last night. She "walked" 822 steps before we finished.
New charity walk idea!
he just kept repeating that I have nice areolas
after he fucked me and not his girlfriend, i told him to be a gentleman and close his eyes as i ran to the bathroom naked. so sweet.
your definition of "gentleman" is so absurd.
My dad told me my only assignment from now til graduation is to not die. it's a legit concern for him.
It's stupid hot. I just want to be laying in a bathtub full of margaritas
his face was nice enough, but his choice of footwear screamed columbian drug lord
Either sorry for fondling you Saturday or thank you for letting me fondle you Saturday.
You suck at answering, but you did manage to avoid a fun conversation about hemorrhoids. So maybe you're great at answering.
So apparently Facebook just randomly finds the girl who gave me a hard handy despite having no mutual friends...
Did I wash my face last night at your house? Where did my eyebrows go??
was i wearing any clothes at that point?
socks and a thong
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