Is it 'vaginas' or 'vaginae?'. Either way there were a shit ton of them.
Let me rephrase. Would it display my intentions too much if i walked all the way across my office and into the bathroom carrying my book
I just asked the dr if it was herpes while wearing my shirt from the strip club...
I told you to stay away from the strippers in Oklahoma
Mom just posted ur drunk pix from Cancun in the newly made "My not-so-fantastic son" album. Thought you should know.
Look if you're not going to be mine and take care of my needs, I'm going to fuck your sisters.
Do you ever feel like your dog agrees with you? Like REALLY really agrees.
As your attorney I advise you to rage rapidly
The DJ was throwing glowsticks into the crowd and managed to smack one guy in the face with them
She's like a solid nine. Well maybe not a tomorrow morning nine, but she's a nine right now and trying to take me home.
Just found some confetti on my nipple if that's any indicator of how the night went
You have the perkiest tits in all of North America. You're fine.
he had to stop me from eating snow off the street on the way back to pick up our cars. that's how hungover i am.
Drinking at 10 in the morning and swimming might not be the best idea I've ever had but it beats working
I just came in my own mouth don't ask me how cuz it really hurt and felt good at the same time.
had to remind myself that killing him is not a good career move AGAIN.
Randomize
