she was hot for a redneck and i dont look at teeth
Don't judge me. Haven't eaten all day so I'm in my room sticking my finger in peanut butter, then jam, then my mouth.
Street performer on bourbon st just lifted a sewer top so I could puke down it. I love New Orleans.
There's some drunk girl alone in the field, she looks like she could use some help.
Also it's only fair that you know that that girl is me.
Is it hot in here? Is the room moving? Its moving. The room is moving. Its spinning like a top. Have you ever been covered in puke? What are you doing?
LSD in a sugar cube. Dropped it in my whiskey sour and felt like I was rowing a boat.
He sent me a Microsoft outlook meeting request to blow him in the storage room at work. I had to accept.
My mom just invited me to come with them on their honeymoon to Mexico this summer. And I got a Bump-It in my stocking.
Pass the awkward sauce please.
I'm drowning in it here
There were four people in the car. The girls sure know how to blow. I think we almost crashed when the driver climaxed.
I guess crabs is what I get for sleeping with my ex.
My dad sent me a 10 ft beer bong and my mom sent me ideas for future careers. I'll let you guess who my favorite parent is. Also, come over tonight. and bring beers.
I'm turning into an adult here.
Adults touch each other's special zones.
Whoever was doing lines off my iPad is a dick. Also bring Gatorade, for I hunger
For Who flesh?
There is resin on and IN the refrigerator. Its even on the food. My god, what happens to you?
Within the first 2 minutes of this morning, I found out the Lions lost on last play, and Scott Weiland died. I wont be in today.
Randomize
