You hurt me so bad and it feels so good
she gave me one of her senior pics and told me specifically to give it to you. In other words she still wants to suck your dick.
I'm also annoyed at my horoscope for not warning me of my perils
I just realized I'm not towing a trailer. I thought this whole drive home I was towing a trailer. Wow too high
Hey for future reference vodka can not be substituted for water when shaving your legs
I don't care if he's straight, his cock will be in my mouth by midnight. Like a closeted Cinderella.
I just feel like a girl who's never eaten a pb&j probably doesn't swallow
Would you feed me pudding while my fake tan dries?
She just kept introducing me to people by telling them which of their friends I've fucked
He probably thinks you're playing hard to get.
Hard to get?? I'm playing leave me the fuck alone.
My hands are stained pink. I look like I fisted a muppet.
How high is the bridge and how deep is the water and what are the chances I will get arrested
I have bits of ceiling fan all over now
Her vag MUST be made out of starbursts or something equally as delicious.
I refuse to shit my pants for anyone except Cher and Christina Aguilera!
Randomize
