I totally thought the tree was playing the guitar
Why the hell does jager make you get to the point of having to army crawl around cause you cant feel your legs and scream jaga bombs when puking??
It felt like getting blasted with a supersoaker filled with vagina juice.
Please don't drown this weekend. It would be a shame to lose a dick like yours.
Bring enough bail money and little extra for tacos after
He may only be 25% black, but after that sexual experience I am 100% never going back.
Wake up. Pour coffee. Open blinds. Guy is skipping class and jacking off furiously to Asian porn. Close blinds. Finish coffee. So this must be what med school is like.
Oh if we have sex in public no one will frown upon it. They will stand and cheer for it
i fell out of the car and didnt spill my drink. come overrrr
truly a win in your book
I'm a 23 year old adult who just ordered condoms online from Target because I'm still too embarrassed to buy them in the store.
The moment I said this burrito on my nuts feels really good is the moment I knew I was drunk
UPS just delivered me 30lbs of dried cherries... I shouldn't be allowed online when I take painkillers.
Why is there multiple peanut butter and toasts stuck to the fridge door?
probably because i sent a bunch of guys a snap saying happy one year to my nipple piercings
Remind me to tell you: When threeways go awry, my MLK weekend story.
Randomize
