Really? You have stories that rival having a threesome with the two best friends of the guy your kinda seeing? Thats impressive.
Just cropdusted the office
I'm so fucking pissed that I wasted my shooting star wish on him and his little penis.
yeah well we're currently on the phone and she's telling me about how much she misses me and all this shit and i muted myself and i'm watching porn.
I gurantee you I'll be the only one dressed as a giraffe.
Yeaaah. I'm kinda wary about that guy. Does he still have that taser that he found on the train?
she tried strangling devon with the garden hose. pretty sure they're broken up
Oh, I never thought you were a dick. You were one of the best morally comprised ideas I've ever had.
As your attorney I advise you to rage rapidly
As an added realisation of today. If we used the last time I got laid as a conceiving date I would have a two week old baby. It's been too long...
And then I told him since the day he walked away to get over what I went through he lost the boyfriend right to ask why my bed is broken.
I take full pride in being the one that broke ur bed. Want to go for the sofa?
I just had to take my laptop away from him because he was on Amazon and had 20 Seahawks garden gnomes in his cart.
well a fat roach just fell out of my hair. so there's that
FUCK IM ABOUT TO GET A DICK PIC IN THE LIBRARY
If there's anything my liberal arts education has taught me, it's belligerence.
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