my vag is so smooth its legendary
should I fuck that poor girl
no dude she won't be able to afford a fucking abortion
she asked if she could keep her bee antennas on during her mugshot. i love halloween.
I just remember getting him back by licking the window on his truck.
the remote is under the fat chick passed out on the couch. Good luck .. and may god have mercy on your soul.
Feel like I died but someone put me In a human microwave and I got back to life.
Less than a month to go... I do not understand how I was able to put up with a roommate who wears bright green Crocs for a year.
Who gives a hand job to a 19 yr old one night then the next lets a 31 year old random man fly a plane to town and pick u up and take u to dinner?
Dude we need to hang out soon. I'm in the mood to get arrested again.
I left my parents and ran through the airport. I was like I'm not getting stuck in Atlanta tonight and not having sex.
You're a mystery wrapped in an enigma wrapped in a redhead
Lmao a dude who just got out of prison said im worth 10 cigarettes in prison...I think that's a compliment
What??! Dude I'm not having you barging in at like 2 am smelling of cigarettes and disappointment to sleep on my couch and then have an awkward morning with my wife while I'm at work.
Touché sir
We're both fucking guys named Frank. Our friendship was meant to be.
Are you coming over for scrambled eggs and hand jobs?
Randomize
