I wanna bring you to show and tell
we got sick of 7 11 doubles so we made up a game where you just drink when anyone rolls a 5
thats barely a game just flip a coin
should we drink on heads or tails?
How can i ever say i miss u when u wont go away
You act like I'm friends with her or something. I only screw her boyfriend!
Oh yeah.
I've drank myself into a smaller pants size. Who ever said alcoholism was unhealthy was mistaken.
his dick is like his red hair, amazing but useless
I'm going to make him fall in love with me one blow job at a time.
cliffnotes. writing studyguide on last pack of smokes. glad this semester is over.
Note to self, stop going out with self absorbed bisexuals
You're the third Mark I've fucked in that bed.
Maybe why that's why I'm perpetually single... I can't find a guy with bigger balls than mine.
so do you remember taking your shirt off and just standing in your bra at the bar or no?
And by "sexually intimate," you mean fuck buddies?
He had me sit on his face until I begged him to stop, then held me there 5 minutes longer. I rested my head on his chest, told him I needed time to recover....and slept for 6 hours. By the time I woke, he was already at work. I just sent him a countdown times until his shift is over.
Dry spell is over and now I’m drowning in a river of dick. The dam broke and now half the dicks in DC are trying get in my skirt
It’s a glorious dick miracle!
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