I hid a 6pack in the microwave for later
I knew I liked you
never. drinking. again.
lets not get ahead of ourselves.
I knew the sex would be bad when he slipped the rubber on and said "safe sex activated"
Why does Thanksgiving make hot girls feel disgusting and fat girls feel horny? Its killing my prospects.
I puked for half an hour, but I went and danced afterwards, and that made me feel better.
You are so irish.
I just saw a guy in front of the courthouse giving himself a sobriety test and fail it...this can't end well
Hungover Fun Fact #4: Eating a grilled stuffed burrito WILL make you blow chunks in the ice maker at work.
I told him I don't date guys unless they play a musical instrument. So, he's here and he brought a kazoo.
Breathalizer & tazer party did not go as casually as expected.
dude you had a hot girl interested and took shots together, as soon as it went down the hatch you upchucked on her entire existance..
successful birthday. 2012 rules
Who wrote "the chamber of secrets has been open, enemies of the heir beware" across my bathroom wall?
Why is the clock ticking so loud? Now I know how Captain Hook feels.
Can we fangirl? Can we have fangirl Tuesdays?
Sure lol what's that?
Oh, dear, sweet Laura. Please start singing A Whole New World. I have Aladdin's part, you're Jasmine.
Why?
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Also I am throwing a blaZer over what I wore to bed and calling it an outfit.
Drunk you decided to patrol campus as the Arrow and tell random bystanders "YOU HAVE FAILED THIS CAMPUS." Campus P.D. did not join your crusade.
That explains the nerd bow & arrow...
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