Well listen chief - never again do i want the scenario of going to the ER totally naked and partially drunk to b a possibility.
If you could channel this insane talent for stalking you'd be a great weapon for this country. If you had a crush on Bin Ladin, guaranteed he'd be found, monitered and tagged within five days.
Your an asshole
Actually, it's "you're an asshole"
My point exactly
I feel like abortions should bother me more
she said my body looked tiny like it was a bad thing and then didn't even mention how great my tits look. it's like we're not even friends.
I'm eating dry tortillas on a mattress without a sheet. and i thought my life would change after graduation.
I spiked my fruit smoothie. Taking bikini season diet to a whole new level
My mom would probably be ok with my lifestyle as long as she doesn't see that photo of me doing bong rips in a Jesus costume.
I just slow jerked to the titanic theme song, i dont think theres enough alcohol in the state to get me over her tonight
I gave his parents a candle as a thanks for letting me hang out there all the time. Which i guess is more accurately a thanks-for-letting-me-fuck-your-son candle
tell me why they applauded then the bartender locked himself in the bathroom when i walked into the bar today ????
so I guess I made a note in my phone last night to remind myself not to do shrooms on the cruise ship
i just passed i guy i once let listen to me masterbate on the phone...nyc is not big enough
I think you're my feminist conscience sometimes.
Tbh.. I hope he still watches our sex tapes so he can be reminded of what he's missing out
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