That girl really should ne nicer to her vagina. It's not a playground.
Apparently hers is a theme park.
Liz and I are now offficially highest. OH, and your girlfriend may be a vampire. Heads up. SPARKLESSSSS
Put my glitter back.
he likes ron paul.... that's all i'm going to say....
i want to major in coloring with an emphasis on crayons.
so finals studying is going well?
I just made the answer to all my security questions "fuck you" with various levels of ! marks. I may regret this in the morning.
The cop told you to put your hands behind your back and you slurred "I'm not falling for that again"
The kind of drunk where you put two tampons in thinking that it'll last me longer ...
Please come over, I'm slowly melting into a ball of sexual frustration. If I'm not dead by the end of the day be very surprised.
Now he's crying and asking for 'the cameras' to come out. The one cop is laughing
My whole sorority girl exterior is just a lie. I'm a fat tumblr girl on the inside.
The whorange rubbed off. His white shirt was so gross at the end of the night I told him to frame it.
Told my brother the truth how I meet her...I grabbed the first thing I could when the cops came. 10 months later we are engaged.
Taking a shit in a Texas 7/11... not accepting phone calls now lol
You WHAT?!?!
Paid. A. Homeless. Guy. To. Throw. A. Drink. In. Her. Face.
I fucking love you.
will you help me invent vagina-safe pop rocks?
Randomize
