doug butabi!
steve butabi!
hotties wanna shake it
Moan for me like Helen Keller
I can't make any promises. I've tried my best to stay celibate. But if a guys on top of me, Im gonna tell him to stick it in.
I just gave my whole company pinkeye. How's that for a summer intern's lasting impression? BOOYAHH
He walked in and put an x made out of tape on the floor. He then announced that he was going to pass out there. Cocky or strategic?
i cant get the smell of ass out of my nose
so i finally decided to ask her out. she started mumbling, then she puked on me. i think i'll try again when she's sober
Just ordered a clown who does balloon animals. No backing out now.
I'm pretty sure I just had a convo with my hot pockets about how they weren't good enough for the oven.
She's grinding on a deaf black man and I'm the interpreter.
And then you proceeded to sneak behind thee bar and hold up an empty bottle of vodka and scream LOOK WHO THE BARTENDER IS NOW BITCH!
My mom just told me the story of how she met my dad through prison. How was your saturday?
I'm toasting stale bread and thinking of you
Is that a sex thing?
Like you haven't hit rock bottom until you have had to throw your own turd out a window
I wanna print it out and hang it on the fridge like parents do with good report cards.
oh the joys of a picture of a negative pregnancy test
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