wait.. the condom broke. ehh whatever i think im already 2 months pregnant
Her problem is just that he inner beauty is just as ugly as her physical beauty
i woke up naked with 27 half ripped $ bills in my bed from ripping them off the wall of the bar
I saw a seagull swallow a hot-dog whole today, it reminded me of you.
Two girls are doing the worm relatively well on the bar floor after the fact I just saw one puke in the trash
So I put about 15 worms in the cuervo bottle. I don't think that's how it works but I feel like hallucinating by 11am
I Apparently saved a picture of the Eiffel tower in between 2 pics of his dick. It appears to be the same size. I fucking love Paris.
Don't remember shit. It was only until I saw the glaze on my forearm that I knew you drove to get donuts last night. I also spent 20$ there apparently
Get here, there are important joints to be smoked and pies to be eaten
But yeah, that is officially the new "I just came" picture
you guys have a strange definition of the word fun. I would have said dangerous, terrifying, or life-threatening. of course, bowling can now be described the same way.
we all thought you were asleep. he found you an hour later sitting outside in the snow lighting a bowl, singing the CatDog theme song, and hugging a box a Franzia.
Had to walk of shame past Westminster Abbey this morning. Pretty sure a Japanese tourist took a photo of me.
Dude, naked camping ALWAYS takes precedence. I would skip my own funeral to go naked camping.
So I forgot to ask, how was that bartender you slept with two weeks ago?
Google chlamydia.
Randomize
