gin and tonic in a mug. no limes so im using canned madarin oragnes. classy or trashy?
homeless.
it never fails, everytime he manages to fuck my earrings out of my ears.
My dad told me my only assignment from now til graduation is to not die. it's a legit concern for him.
Seriously, in what other class can the final major discussion be what bar you're going to with your prof?
Nothing like a marijuana chart of usage in each country to make me understand math.
Ps you missed quite a show. I was for some reason whipping my hair back and forth and head butted the tip jar. It shattered and now I have a circular bruise on my forehead. All the bartenders hit the floor to get all the quarters.
i don't remember going ever taking off my pants but my pubes are shaved into a K and kelsey is passed out in the shower.
Whenever I see women with terribly drawn on brows, I just wanna tackle them and redo them and run away. I'll be Brow-lady. The beauty superhero
We need to get stoned and watch Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles 2. This has become a priority. Schedule accordingly.
I don't want to be "that guy" but I may have accidentally sent a dick pic to your mom
Sitting in a waiting room with 15 children has me contemplating if I ever want to have sex again...
So we were fooling around last night and suddenly Like A Virgin popped up on his itunes
OMG haha What did he say?
He told me that if I laughed, I would have to leave.
I just upped my southern womanhood. Taking whiskey and Kleenex pocket packs to the funeral.
i was ready to conquer the fucking world. i would have fought vin deisel to the death without hesitation
Its pretty bad when you can tell twins apart by the size of their penises...
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