my debutante medallion kept hitting his balls when i went down on him
he told my vagina that he was looking forward to meet it
Charging the asians next door to us $5 a page to print their final papers because theirs broke. Bars close in 2 hours, lets go
i said good morning to each one of his abs personally
One date. That's all it took. I want to have his geunis babies in me. One date.
It's nights like those I refer to my life motto: You can't be just friends with someone after you've seen their genitals.
When did I go from having sugar daddies to being one? And does it count as a tax write off?
we were playing waterfall, then strip waterfall, then we were just listening to music, drinking, and slowly becoming more naked
You got me so high that I almost couldn't leave my house for a bar because there was nothing to lean against on the way there
I may or may not have pissed on my floor last night
Welcome to 22
I have just been informed that my company has ray guns. I WORK FOR ACTUAL BOND VILLAINS. THIS IS NOT A DRILL.
I'm currently sitting beside my brother who is taking a bath and feeding him nachos while he covers his genitals. If that's not sibling bonding then I don't know what is
I don't care. She's the only girl to make me feel like my face is melting when she blows me.
She said she was sober from drugs for a week. All I heard was Kenny Loggins singing Danger Zone.
im just letting you know I walked in on you with four different guys last night. a. you were all naked. b. they're all roommates
Randomize
