you dont need to remember merediths name haha. only jane
like we started out all organized and composed and within thirty mins people were throwing up in the bushes, arguing over a beer bong and jumping in the pool with their clothes on
I just realized his fb pic was taken in a public bathroom.
nothing like Chinese food and masturbating on a Saturday night
You walked away saying that you had to pee and you never came back. We found you an hour later in his roommate's bed. Under the covers. Still in your wet bathing suit.
And our DD is passed out in the bathtub with the curtain closed. What happened tonight
Hooked up with a guy solely because he had a chameleon. Priorities.
He also turned out to be underage (the fucking liar) so we had to get drunk on cooking sherry
He's writing a strongly worded email to Trojan right now
I TOLD YOU THE BARESKIN CONDOMS WEREN'T AS RELIABLE.
Is this the guy that did shots off my ass at the beach? Haha
Whatever. I have his dick. Haha how many girls can say they have a dildo replica of a guy they were seeing
I know you're having some issues right now but can we focus on the gangbang?
Why the fuck am I at this dorm meeting? I don't pay $50,000 a year to stay sober.
It will pretty much be equal to the feeling I had when you let me hold your dick while you were peeing, or when I graduated high school!
So I got a text from him saying "jacking off...thinking of you" I think I'm going to get a restraining order
Randomize
