butt plug
anus plug
rubbish cock?
yes
you suck at this game today
Yeah...you.wanna.hang.out.tomorrow?My.space.button.is.broken.
I just had my first uncircumcised penis. I kept staring at it like the foreskin was going to fall off on its own.
Her vagina smelled like chicken
why do you say that
chicken smells like everything
he aimed his bare ass at the sparkler, farted, and it really did work...i love 4th of july anal fire works
Also we decided you're the person whose going to die at my bachelor party...do the math you're the most logical choice
At one point, the guy you were fucking high-fived with the guy I was fucking. We should hang out with them again?
She passed out on the kitchen table with two mickeys forties duct taped to her hands. Clearly she is going to fit perfectly in your house this semester
Tid bit for you to add to your "what to expecting when you're expecting to lose your virginity" book... Sex on nyquil is cheaper and BETTER than sex on esctacy AND you sleep like a champ after so you're not able to think about any bad decisions made.
I didnt want you guys to know I needed to puke, so I just nonchalantly did in my solo cup and threw it out the window
The school security guard knows my name.... I think I'm missing some memories...
Although I'm glad you didn't let my climb in the sink, I really wish you would have let me pretend to be a duck in the shower for a little longer
my nose is crying tears of wow.
I let him use my phone and now I keep getting gay cruise ads, I guess he forgot to mention something.
You're the air beneath my wings and the lookout when I pee
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