Dude ! Why is there vomit with whole pieces of sushi in the shower when the toilet is not more than 2 feet away ? btw you need to chew your food better,
that thing about your dad's boner was meant to be a compliment
if i died would you start the facebook group?
Note: footlong is not the password to the subway wi fi network.. p.s- im super high
he used his one phone call on me and it said "you have a collect call from- LETS GET IT- at the montgomery county jail".
Making and watching you take a mixed shot with vodka, chocolate syrup, tobasco sauce, cranberry juice, and sundried tomato juice wasnt the highlite of my night. Hearing you puking from downstairs was.
Hey on the reals though tomorrow if i take you out to lunch as just a friend will you also suck my cock as just a friend?
She thought that based on the way she feels that she got drugged last night, but come on, her turn on word is hello, who needs to drug that??
There is nothing more demoralizing than exchanging 150 dollar Christmas gifts with a girl your not sleeping with
I found one of your hair extensions on the dance floor. You put it back in your hair
Makes sense. My grandma just did this shot. MY FAMILY KICKS ASS.
Locals got pissed I was talking to the barmaid. Tried to tell me that they keep all the good beer at "a Soho walkup" Google saved me
He keeps bees of course he's weird
Have you heard yourself have sex?
I'm not THAT loud...
My neighbors filed a noise complaint.
twas supposed to be night one of rebound break but it was night one of get sloppy drunk and dance half naked in an ice shack
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